Speaking of Traditions

I have such a treat for you. Literally. A treat.

I owe it to you—to myself—to dive into the delight that is cookies at least once this December. And with it being the Monday of a week that will be so busy I’ll be lucky if I can see straight, I thought it was a good idea to pull out a recipe. Not just any recipe.  My family’s traditional Christmas cookie recipe.

One time somebody told me that he only watches his favorite movie once a year so that he doesn’t get sick of it. He said it built anticipation and excitement if he only allowed himself one viewing. And it totally works. Especially with cookies. I wait all year for these babies. I can hardly wait to get these gooey, cherry-filled heeping gobs of chocolate in my mouth.

Sound delish? They are.

This recipe can be found in the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook. And if you really want to get it right, you should probably look there. But I think I’m more fun. You’ve got to take a few risks in life, right? Ahem. Let’s begin:

If you’re going to make a cookie, you’re going to need some ingredients:

1 Jar of Maraschino cherries

1/2 cup butter

1 cup sugar

1/4 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

1 egg

1 1/2 tsp vanilla

1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

1 1/2 cups flour

1 cup semisweet chocolate chips

1/2 cup sweetened condensed milk

Now, I should note, you probably should have a gigantic bag of chocolate chips like the one in this picture. It’s the Costco size. Because you need to be able to taste test the chips to make sure they’ll be good for baking. And you want to make sure you have enough.

Okay, so the fun part first. Grab the jar of maraschino cherries (phew! is that hard for anyone else to spell?) and a small bowl. Drain all the juice out of the jar. No, it’s not formaldehyde, although I’ve had my doubts. Be sure to spill some on your counter. You’ll want the full effect of freaking out when the juice makes a bright pink stain. Or is that just me? Whatever you do, don’t dump the juice. You’ll kick yourself later.

Cut up the cherries into halves. And if you’re skittish about using maraschino cherries, don’t be. Brandon doesn’t like them usually, but the chocolate dulls the sugary flavor and adds a nice texture to the cookie.

Now grab a nice sized bowl. To make the dough, dump the cup of sugar, powder, soda, salt, and softened butter in the bowl and start a churnin’. Now, you could probably beat this with your 90th anniversary limited edition candy apple red Kitchenaid stand mixer. If you were so lucky to get one. But we strapping viking women beat our own dough. We do it with vigor. And passion. And love. Or something like that. These cookies come together by the strength of our arm. We don’t need no stinking mixer. (Except seriously. When’s my turn to get one?)

Throw in the egg and vanilla next. And beat some more.

Then throw in the cocoa powder and flour. Don’t be afraid to heap in the cocoa powder. It’ll just be a bit more chocolatey. This part is tricky because you’ll want to mix in the flour really well.

And excuse me, but I’m tired. I don’t have a mixer. So I’ll use my hands.

Don’t worry, they were clean. And now the dough is really well mixed. But oh no! I’ve got chocolate cookie dough all over my fingers! What am I going to do? Probably should taste it. It would be the responsible thing to do. And I’m all about responsibility. Don’t worry, I washed my hands again. I’m no double dipper.

If everything goes well, you should be able to pick up the dough and roll it into small balls. Stick them about 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet.

Mmmm. Chocolate balls. Try to at least make one full cookie sheet. It can be difficult to get it from the bowl to the tray, but I believe in you. I know you can do it. Once this step is done, you’re ready for the awesomeness that is this cookie.

When we were kids, this next step was the best part about the entire recipe. Because you get to stick your fingers in the dough. On purpose. And your mom wants you to do it. Go ahead. Try it.

Take your thumb and press the center of each and every little ball.

Wasn’t that fun? Now grab the halved cherries and stick one half in the center of each cookie. It should fit perfectly.

Now comes the extra chocolatey part. Get out a small sauce pan and throw in a bunch of chocolate chips. Put it on low-ish medium-ish heat. You’ll pour the sweetened condensed milk right in the pan to make sure the chocolate doesn’t burn.

Oh, and remember the formaldehyde—I mean, cherry juice I told you to keep? Yea. Put in about 3 or 4 teaspoons of the juice into the melted chocolate. This will bring out a delightful cherry flavor to the chocolate. It basically ties the whole cookie together. So don’t mess this part up—I mean, you’re doing great! Keep it up! Eat a chocolate chip!

When it’s good and chocolatey and melty and perfect, lower the heat a bit and grab a spoon. This is important. Are you listening? Be generous. This is the season of giving. Of love. Of love handles. Don’t be stingy, get a big glob of chocolate and spread it all over the top of that cookie. There is always more (we’ve got the Costco bag, right?).

And you’re almost done! Stick these bad boys into the oven at 350 degrees for about 8-10 minutes. Be sure not to overcook them because they’ll dry out. And these cookies are meant to be chewy. Otherwise, your husband may eat one or two and pretend like he’s not hungry every time you offer one to him. I’m not saying that happened or anything. But it could.

And that’s about it. These cookies make it really feel like Christmas. I know what you’re thinking. What do these have to do with Christmas? Um, absolutely nothing. Except I’ve been making these every year since I could tie my own shoes and poor my own milk. I’m pretty sure you can’t risk December without them.